The E MESS – "Your Makrigialos Fix"

Quote from Matt "it’s a state of mind"

ISSUE NUMBER SEVENTEEN COMMENCING SOMETIME END OCTOBER 2001

The Editor of this little missive has been very lax of late in taking notes - also somehow even though the season is pretty well over there is still stuff to do.

Saturday morning we had rain - about five minutes of it - everywhere smells fabulous and fresh - its also a bit chilly K. Niko is about to put logs in the fire place for the first time since the spring.

Last night was maybe the last night at Porfira and Ed was conscripted once more to assist - an excellent night was had by all with live music - Len only threw one wobbler and that was before the customers arrived!!!!

The only problem was Ed's favourite Chicken in the pot was all GONE. On the bright side Vassilis is in Heraklion so maybe Big Macs for supper - perhaps even warm ones ooooo what luxury.

Andonis left on Tuesday and Daniella made it back from Heraklion with a warm McRoyal wow!!!

Arrivals and departures over the last few weeks are Sue Lane who brought Sue ladies underwear and Mikle who brought Sue a remote control fart machine - go figure!!!! En route as I write is Anns husband Mark who is now about 50 miles from Piraeus.

Other departure include Fred who left her pussies behind with Len - think about that one!!!

Lookalikes - Mikle reckons that Tasia the help at Piperia looks like Janice Battersby on Coronation Street - the poor girl was totally perplexed at being hauled out of the Caf in Pefki and photographed by herself on the steps by a guy she had never seen before!!!

STOP PRESS - Len will reopen Porfira on Sunday!!!!!!!

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TIMOTHYS BICYCLE IS STOLENI I'm sure that you have all missed this column - thanks to Fergus I relate the following tale. It seems that Fergus and Tim were partaking of a beer or two in Status. Tim decided to leave his bicycle at Status asking Fergus to remind him where it was. What do you know but the following day Tim is hammering on Fergus' door with that wonderful cry "someone has stolen my bicycle"

Ann had a bicycle riding lesson off Sue yesterday - can you believe she had never ridden a proper bicycle - she actually managed about twenty feet!!! Good effort however it required several beers and half a packet of cigarettes to recover!!!

Mary bought Sue a wonderful bicycle seat cover - bright pink and full of this gel stuff - its really comfortable - it came can't you guess from the States

Alternate reading - Len will shortly be writing his autobiography - the proposed title is "its all my own fault"

TRAVEL ADVISORY If you are flying into Athens on Virgin from the UK you are on the only flight from a non Schengen country that comes in through the Schengen only gate - no one knows why, it just does.

QUOTES OF THE WEEK[S]

Sue and Sues friend Maggie came from Athens for the weekend and upon noticing a "machine" in the village said "What's that? An exercise machine" No we said it’s a rotavator these city people really!!!

Mary "it was good it was so much food"

Last week Alki had his Kazanema - that’s raki brewing up at Sikia - The guy sitting next to Mary spoke some English and turned to Mary and said as he held his glass up" White Bottoms" - much to the amusement of us all - Maggie who speaks Greek like a native explained it’s the literal translation of the English term bottoms up!!! Nice one that.

CULTURE Sunday is Oki Day there will be a parade in Koutsouras at 11am - however chaos could ensue as the clocks go back on Saturday

PROGRESS ON ANN AND MARKS HOUSE. Ann has just taken Ron and Margaret for a visit but the last reports stated that the roof was on!!!

FISH Still two - but they are a bit thick - Manoli said they were being fed too much so now we have to watch them eat their breakfast - the problem is the daft things can’t find their food even though it always floats on the top!!

FISHERMAN JACKS - Pretty blue fish from Jan - and Mikle brought a plastic singing turtle - looks like a tortoise to me…. Mikle also painted his rocks whilst here he painted a Vassili Fish and a Quinn Fish- unfortunately you will have to come see them as words don't work and WE DO NOT DO PICTURES IN THE EMESS

BIG MAC INDEX A couple of weeks ago we had a Big Mac flood Five [thanks Iris] appeared with Sue's birthday champagne [ thanks Vassilis] so when Alkis went to the loo we let Creta have one- oh boy did she love that. Alkis has always said she would never touch such crap but that’s not true!! However accusations about poisoning my dog were in the air!!

The village is getting very wintry looking - the last Kosmars left last night, Simply leave on Tuesday and Villea is open till the end of November - its actually great here at that this time of the year the village reverts back to its "proper" self. Having beers with Daniela and Ann in Time Out we were seeing people who we have not seen since the spring - we wonder now how many foreigners actually live here.

Olive picking will start soon - there are vacancies - anyone interested let me know Please note that you get paid more money if you speak Greek - about 2000 dracs more per day. Experience also counts, therefore it could be your only opportunity to earn less than an illegal Albanian immigrant!!!

Visit the Villea Village Website

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Phone 0843 51697 Fax 51702